If I Figured Out Time Travel, This Is What I’d Send Back to my 20-year-old-self

Daily writing prompt

What is something you wish you could tell your 20-year-old self?

Note: Two days in a row I am doing the Daily Writing Prompt….

Love Letters & Hard Lessons An Essay by Che Michelle

If I Figured Out Time Travel, This Is What I’d Send Back

Things I wish I could tell my 20-year-old self — about the plan, the light, the Ford Focus, and the Midol.

By Che Michelle · Thriving, and Still Going

Dear You — yes, you, reading this in what I can only assume is mild confusion — I mean you just found this letter while your 20, young and going to school.

If you are reading this, it means I figured out time travel. I cannot change what happens, the timeline doesn’t work like that, but I can emotionally prepare you for what’s coming so you can navigate it better, smarter, and with significantly fewer financial failures. What you do with this information is up to you. If you think it’s nonsense, throw it away. If something in your gut says pay attention and it will, because your gut has always been smarter than your logic, then use it. Use every word.

And if I suddenly get new memories? I’ll know you changed something. Let’s hope it worked.

On Your Family and Your Friends

Your family is right about some of your friends. I know that’s not what you want to hear. I know it feels like interference, like they don’t understand, like they’re being over-protective to the point of suffocation. But here’s the truth that it took me longer than it should have to accept they have simply lived longer than you, and they can read signs you haven’t learned to recognize yet.

They’re not jealous. They’re not trying to isolate you. They want you to have friends, real ones. The kind that builds you up instead of quietly chipping away at your confidence while smiling at your face. And honestly? For a family that could have been much harsher about it, they were incredibly gentle with you. Gentler than you realize and with more patience than you ever offered back. Listen to them when the advice is not in an authoritative tone, but a softer, loving tone. It’ll save you from an existential crisis that, otherwise, is going to land right on schedule at 39 and feel entirely like your fault. Some of it will be your fault. I can’t help you with that part (Bonus advice, take accountability and change your bad behavior). Just listen to the family about your friends, they have your best interest at heart especially when those friends show their true feelings in front of them.

On the Plan You Had for Your Life

I know about the plan. You get married at 28, first kid at 30, second at 32. Tidy. Organized. It’s you, planning your life down to the date. I need to tell you, with all the love I have in my heart: That plan got blown up to absolute smithereens, and it is the best thing that ever happened to us.

You were not emotionally ready to be anybody’s wife at 28. You did not have the resources to be anyone’s mother at 30. And the life you actually get to live in the space where that plan used to be? It’s going to make you smile in ways you cannot currently imagine. You still end up with love. You still end up with the things you want. Just not when you think. And the version of you who gets there will be so much more prepared to actually receive it and reciprocate it to person who deserves it.

“You may have dreamed about being a wife. But you’re going to live a life so much bigger than that dream. Let the dream go so the best version of your life can find you.”

Do Not Buy That Ford Focus

I am completely serious. The blue one. You brought it either in 2015 or 2016, I don’t remember when, but don’t buy it! You’ll know when your then boyfriend suggested for you to get that car and not the Two-door Honda Accord, that you like. He will make it sound like an it’s good idea, has great value. It is not a good idea. That car is a money pit on wheels, and it is going to cost you in ways that will make you say words you didn’t know you knew. Find someone you trust, go to a different dealership, and buy something else. Better yet, don’t take that man with your car shopping! Anything else will be a million times better than that of the Blue Devil. This is the most logistical piece of advice I can offer you and I need you to take it personally. No BLUE FORD FOCUS!

On People Who Try to Dim Your Light

They’re coming. I want you to be ready. People are going to try to dim your light, and they’ll do it for one of three reasons. The first is jealousy, pure and simple, from people who have never learned to believe in themselves. The second is desire: they want what you have, and because they can’t figure out how to build it for themselves, they’ll try to dim your light by making you doubt your light, your intelligence. The third is the strangest one, they’ll try to dim your light to protect you from other people who want access to it. Fear dressed up as concern. They will tell you about doing events, cause it is not the norm. These people will use logic, and concern to convince you not to try, or not to put yourself out there for people to know who you are. It looks like love. It isn’t, its fear and it will confuse you. Stand strong in your belief and do it!

Here’s how you handle all three: practice your affirmations. Write your dreams down in blue ink in a notebook. Make a plan and execute the plan. The life you’re building will not be out of someone else’s paranoia, but out of your wisdom, your intuition and your vision for your life. You don’t owe everyone a front row seat to your becoming. Let people who try to imitate you do it. They’re too unoriginal to sustain it. Walk away and let them figure that out without your help and energy.

Also, I mean this does not let anyone talk you out of your intuition. Your intuition has kept you alive, when your survival skills were lacking. Your Spidey sense has kept you out of rooms you had no business being in. When you get goosebumps along your arm, it is usually a no, and you need to act accordingly. Trust your gut every time.

On Dreams Changing (and That Being Good, Actually)

You are a jack of all trades, and people are going to say it like it’s an insult. It is not. The full quote which people conveniently cut short is “A jack of all trades is a master of none, but often times better than a master of one”. When people cut the quote short, they want to diminish someone to only be good at one thing. You contain multitudes and should explore all of your different layers. Each of those layers will, lead you to a new dream, a better dream. Your dreams are going to shift from your 20s to your 30s to your 40s, and every single shift means you’re growing; you’re seeing more of what’s possible, you’re becoming someone bigger and better than the person who made the original plan. Don’t let anyone shame you for evolving. That’s the whole point of life is to evolve.

On Your Health — Please Listen to This Part

Keep working out. I’m going to say it again because I need you to hear it: keep working out. Protect your body now so it can carry you to places you haven’t dreamed of yet. Your health is your wealth in a way that isn’t a cliché, it is a literal, practical, logistical fact. The other side of not protecting it is not somewhere you want to visit. Stay active. Watch what you eat. Still enjoy your life. Those things are not mutually exclusive, I promise. Also, take care of your damn teeth, we like you have a beautiful smile so you need healthy teeth to smile. ( I bet you started sing Shanice-“I love your Smile”, if so good.

And take the Midol. I’m going to give this its own section because it matters more than it sounds.

Take the Midol (No, Really)

There is a friendship in your life, one of the truest, most generous, most genuinely loving friendships you will experience. There is going to be a moment when you are in real physical pain, the kind that makes you pass out after your shift, and you are going to say something to your friend, while in that pain that you cannot take back. And that person is not going to want to hear that it was the pain talking or that your sorry. It will be too late, and they will walk away from this friendship.

I am telling you now, Take the Midol. Eat something before going to work that day. Listen, don’t speak as they talk to you. If you can save that friendship, save it. It is worth more than whatever you’re about to say in that moment. And if you lose it anyway it was always meant to be a season of friendship in your life and not a lifetime friendship. I want you to know that it was still real, it still counted, and you will carry the best parts of that relationship with you longer than you know. But try to watch your mouth. Take the Midol and listen with no response.

On Death, and the Things People Say Near It

You are going to lose people. Some of those losses will come quietly and you’ll be okay. Others are going to tear something open in you that makes you rethink everything and somehow, in that rethinking, you’re going to find a clarity about your own life that you couldn’t have gotten any other way.

Here is what I need you to know about people who are close to leaving this mortal realm will do, they sometimes say things near the end that sound like rejection of you, erasure of a friendship, erasure of your meaning to them. They will rewrite the entire relationship either as more positive than it was, or that you were just strangers in the night who only said hi once a day. Don’t hold onto those words. I think something happens when a soul is getting ready to leave the mortal realm, like they’re trying to serve as many ties as possible so they can leave more freely. I am telling you to hold onto the dinners, the conversation with nuggets of wisdom. The times they fed you knowledge, praised your skills, and gave you the game of life. Let the last words go, if they sound unlike them. They were not the truth of what you meant to each other.

“Their life was never in vain. And neither was your love for them. Hold onto that and let the rest dissolve.”

The Rules (In Order)

Rule 01 Don’t let anyone take your shine. Not negotiable, not situational, not up for discussion. Your light is yours. Guard it accordingly.

Rule 02 Stop looking for love and start loving yourself. The love you’re searching for outside of you is being built inside of you right now whether you feel it or not. Trust the process.

Rule 03 Take the trip. Go to Japan. Go wherever you’ve been telling yourself you’ll go when things calm down, when you have more money, when it makes more sense. It will never be the perfect time. Save the money quietly, tell no one, and go. You will not regret a single stamp in that passport.

Rule 04 Get the accountant. Do not tell your family. Do not tell your friends. Just find one, pay the fee, and let them help you build the financial life you deserve. This is one of the best decisions you will ever make, and it’s going to feel so adult and so right the moment you do it.

Rule 05 Protect yourself always! Protect yourself enthusiastically, without apology. Your body, your energy, your peace, your destiny. All of it. Energy transfers are real, and some people come into your life specifically to take what’s yours. You are not obligated to make it easy for them.

What I Most Want You to Know

You are not living the life you dreamed. You are living the life you desired, and those are two very different things. You dreamed of being a wife. You became someone who poured love into people who needed it, on your own terms, in your own time. You dreamed of being a mother you have mentored and loved and invested in more children and teenagers more than you can count, and they carried pieces of you whether they know it or not. When it’s time for the rest, it will come.

The people who show up for you the real ones, the ones who love you exactly as you are going to amaze you. You don’t have to beg for their love and acceptance. You don’t have to change yourself for it. You don’t have to wonder if you’re worth it. You are. Full stop. The friendships you have to chase were never yours to begin with, and the ones that stay without being chased are going to be some of the best things in your life.

You have held down two jobs for twenty years simultaneously. You have built something real, quietly, without anyone handing you anything. You are funny, brilliant and more creative than the people who tried to convince you otherwise.

I love you at 20. I will love you in your 30s, and I love you now as we head into the mid-40s. I love every version of you that happened in between, including the ones who made the mistakes that this letter is trying, gently, to help you avoid or at least prepare your for. You are an adventure worth living. Stay healthy so we can keep going.

With everything I’ve got —

Your future self
(Who is doing great, by the way. You’re going to be so proud.)

PS No I didn’t give you lottery numbers. No stock tips. We were never meant to win that way, and honestly? What we built ourselves is better. You’ll see.

P.P.S. — The Ford Focus. I cannot stress this enough. Do not buy that car if you do trade it in as soon as your credit is better.

★ Che Michelle is a writer, cultural commentator, and person who writes her dreams in blue ink and on real paper if you know, you know.

June 16, 2026 2

Setting Boundaries: Preserve Your Energy and Well-Being

Daily writing prompt

Write your guide to setting healthy boundaries in relationships.

View all responses

Life & Self-Preservation an Essay by Che Michelle

A Field Guide to Not Getting on My Last Nerve

On boundaries, energy vampires, unsolicited weight commentary, and the radical act of minding your business.

By Che Michelle · Boundary Enthusiast & Credentialed Nowhere

I have boundaries. Several of them, in fact, and I have spent a considerable amount of time thinking about them, refining them, and preparing to explain them to anyone who will listen and also to a few people who have made it clear they will not. This essay is for both groups. Consider it a public service announcement. Consider it a love language. Consider it a warning.

Let me be clear from the top: having boundaries is different from being difficult. It is different from being cold, or antisocial, or “a lot.” It is the same as knowing yourself well enough to say “Here is where I end and where you begin, and I would appreciate it if you respected that line.” That’s it. That’s the whole thing and yet here we are.

01Do Not Comment on My Weight

This is the one I feel most strongly about and will defend until I leave this earth. Do not comment on my weight. Not if I’ve gained it. Not if I’ve lost it. Not if you’ve noticed a change so dramatic that you feel physically compelled to say something. Keep it in your mind, or mouth. Swallow it. Let it go.

Here is the thing: you are not a physician. You are not a registered dietitian, a nutritionist, a physical therapist, a personal trainer, or a nurse. You are a person who has eyes and opinions, and I did not ask for either of those things today. If I gain weight, I am a woman in my 40s pick a culprit (probably the wine and estrogen). If I have lost weight, I have been watching what I eat. Either way, the situation is handled. We are moving on.

“You don’t know what I’m battling. You don’t know how stressed I am. And frankly, it is not your business to know. That’s the point.”

What I actually want what I think we all actually want for the people we love to be healthy. Not thin. Not a certain size. Healthy. Able to go on a walk without getting winded. Able to sit at a dinner table and eat without feeling anxious about every item on the menu. Comfortable. Present. That is the goal. And none of that requires your unsolicited commentary on my body. So. We’re done here.

02My Appearance Is Not a Conversation Starter

There is a difference a crucial, non-negotiable difference between a compliment and a critique dressed up as concern. “That outfit is giving me a headache, what happened?” Fine. Fair. I can work with that. We can have a conversation about the outfit. But “you never get your hair done” and “why does your hair look like that” and “did you even look in a mirror before you left the house” those are not feedback. Those are you putting your bad energy somewhere it was not invited.

The allowable version of this conversation is simple: “Oh, I like those earrings. Where’d you get them?” And then I tell you, and you either want them or you don’t, and we both go about our lives. That is the transaction. That is all it needs to be. Anything beyond that requires explicit permission that, for the record, I have not given.

03You Cannot Talk About My People

This one has nuance, so pay attention. If I come to you frustrated about something a cousin did, I am venting about the situation. I am not issuing a license for you to call my cousin raggedy. That license does not exist. It never existed. The fact that I said something about them in a moment of frustration does not mean you now have access to that same lane. You do not.

And yes, I take accountability here too. I try not to talk recklessly about the people I love to people who don’t love them the same way, because I will not give anyone ammunition to speak poorly about someone I care about not even when we’re in disagreement, not even when things are hard. If we’re beefing and you call them out of their name, I will correct you. That’s still someone I love. Watch your mouth.

04Respect My Time or Lose Access to It

I will tell you exactly why I stopped inviting people to things: because people change plans an hour before. Because “can we do Wednesday?” becomes “actually I can’t” at 6:47 PM on Wednesday. Because single does not mean available, and “you don’t have kids” does not mean I don’t have a life.

“There are people out there in improv groups. Knitting classes. Going back to school. Just because they haven’t told you doesn’t mean they have time for you.”

I also have a second job, which means I have an employer whose time I respect and coworkers who are counting on me to show up. I am not calling out on a Wednesday night because you decided at noon that you wanted to go to dinner. That is not a character flaw. That is called integrity, and it is becoming rarer by the day.

Making time for someone looks different than simply having free time, and I wish more people understood this distinction. I will rearrange things for you if I care about you and you give me enough notice to do it with grace. Last-minute chaos is not something I’m available for and the fact that I’ve stopped asking doesn’t mean I don’t miss it. I miss dinner parties with friends. I miss the conversation that happens over a meal with people you love. I just stopped being willing to sacrifice my schedule, my income, and my peace for events that might not even happen. That’s math.

05Ask Before You Vent

This one I learned the hard way. I used to vent to friends the way people used to write in diaries freely, regularly, and without checking whether the other person had capacity. And I thought I was just sharing. Turns out some of them thought I was emotionally relocating all of my problems into their living room on a permanent basis. We had different interpretations of the same conversation, and that difference quietly soured things.

So now I ask first. “Hey, is it okay if I talk about something?” And if the answer is no, I receive that no with grace because their no is not a rejection of me. It’s a person telling me where their bandwidth is today, which is actually a form of honesty I respect. I go write it down. I record a voice note. I go talk to my therapist. I handle it.

And look I say this with love if your support system keeps redirecting you to a professional, that is worth paying attention to. Not because your problems aren’t real. But because a therapist is trained for this, and your friends are tired, and those two things can coexist without anyone being the villain.

06Energy Vampires Will Be Blocked

They are real. I need everyone to accept this. There are people who walk into a room and immediately begin redistributing the oxygen somewhere it can’t reach you. Some of them know they’re doing it. Some of them genuinely don’t. It doesn’t matter. The effect on the room is the same.

You have the right a full, complete, God-given right to protect your energy from people who consistently drain it. This is not cruelty. This is not abandonment. This is you deciding that your peace is worth protecting with the same energy you’d use to protect anything else you value. Block the number. Skip the group chat. Wear the crystal if that’s what you believe in. Say your prayer. Do what you need to do. Your energy is not a public utility.

07Do Not Compare Your Life to Mine

We made different choices. That is the entire explanation. Your choices led to your life. My choices led to mine. Neither of us is wrong. Neither of us owes the other a justification. What you are absolutely not going to do is look at where I am, look at where you are, run some internal calculation, and then present me with your findings like I asked for an audit.

Comparison is human. I understand the impulse. But there is a line between a natural moment of reflection and deciding that your choices only make sense if mine were wrong and I will not be standing on that side of the line with you.

08My Spiritual Life Is Not a Debate Topic

I am a practicing Catholic. That is my business, and I have made my peace with it. What I have not made peace with, and will not, is the version of this conversation where you feel called to inform me that I could find God anywhere as though I haven’t considered this, as though the tradition I have chosen is not something I hold with intention and care.

You can talk to me about spirituality. We can discuss meaning, and practice, and the things that ground us. What you cannot do is treat my beliefs like a draft that needs your edits. Nobody’s spiritual practice requires your approval to be valid. Not mine. Not anyone’s. Mind the business that pays you, which in this case is your own soul.

“You’re over there. I’m over here. I’m not going to let you come over here. Stay where you are. With love.”

In Closing

Boundaries are not walls. They are not a sign that something is wrong with you or wrong with the people you love. They are honest communication about what you need in order to show up fully — for yourself and, consequently, for everyone around you. They will change as you change. They deserve to be stated clearly, honored consistently, and revised as needed without guilt.

And if someone in your life consistently cannot respect them? That is also information. Useful, clarifying, sometimes painful information. But information, nonetheless. What you do with it is up to you. Which, when you think about it, is the whole point of having boundaries in the first place.

★ Che Michelle is a writer, cultural commentator, and person with a very clear sense of what she will and will not tolerate. She holds no professional credentials in therapy or nutrition and would like everyone to remember that the neither do they the next time they feel like offering some unsolicited advice.

June 16, 2026 1

The Beauty of Autumn in Baltimore: A Coffee Shop Adventure

Heads up to any readers out there, this post was written in October 2025, and I was in the midst of a temporary lay-off. Dealing with unexpected weight gain, which I found out was due to perimenopause, and just wanted to create an essay, rant, or prose about the thoughts in my head. There is no purpose to this blog; I just wanted to share a glimpse into my life at the time. Also, just writing, writing is becoming a dying art, and I would like for it to make a comeback, like common sense and $5.00 footlongs.

Welcome to another Coffee Chronicles, where today I spend money, I should probably save on a cup of coffee and a meal. Earlier, I kept up with my neighborhood walk, which was supposed to lead to either Sistah’s Sweets or Blueprint Café. These walks have been refreshing to my spirit as I build back up to running in the mornings again. During the pandemic, I ran every day and lost 20 lbs. in 2020. Fast forward to 2025, and I have now reached over 200 lbs. Please don’t tell Toni Fine, I can’t handle her form of critique. My medication has definitely contributed to the weight gain. Despite this, my goal is to walk over 10,000 steps a day. Today, my walk took an unexpected turn when I encountered a man having a psychological break, shouting and threatening those around (and even those not around). At this point, I turned around and took a different route, feeling guilty about not helping yet needing to take care of myself. Along the way, however, I was struck by the often-overlooked beauty of Baltimore’s autumn, the vibrant orange trees rival Vermont’s leaves, while the sun’s warm caress heats the concrete and creates the perfect balance of a warm fall day and a crisp breeze. This temperature swing feels, unmistakably, like a sign of global warming. After my walk, which ended up less brisk than hoped, I made my way to Blueprint Café, only to find it crowded, just like Bird in the Hand Café. Wondering if I have a developing issue with coffee shops beginning with “B,” I scanned the menu, realized it was more of a late-afternoon lunch spot, and decided to try again another day. Debating between Sistah’s Bakeshop and just 7-Eleven coffee, I remembered Kitsch Kitchen. I’ve been there a few times, always enjoying the service, so I decided to grab coffee and maybe a bite before heading home.

Street view with colorful rowhouses and autumn leaves on sidewalk — A person walks a dog along a leafy street lined with colorful rowhouses in fall.

Upon arriving, I saw only one person ahead of me ordering food, which at first seemed promising. However, the wait stretched to five minutes for three items, testing my patience. Realizing my irritation, I took a moment to talk to my inner child and gently parented my ego, reminding myself to stay calm. Once centered, I ordered a drink called “You’re My Best Friend” and Avocado Toast on Honey Grain bread. (For those curious, “You’re My Best Friend” is a drip coffee with shots of espresso, caramel, chocolate, and cinnamon—though I requested no cinnamon). The drink was traditional with hints of chocolate and caramel, while the avocado toast, though good, needed more seasoning. I longed for flaky sea salt or red pepper flakes, especially since Avery Farms’ avocado toast has spoiled me in the past. As a side note, the last time I visited Kitsch, I tried their “Breakfast at Tiffany’s “a smooth maple espresso with just the right amount of sweetness. I really enjoyed that cup of coffee.

I picture myself at R. House, blogging or writing book chapters. My layoff gives me time to rest, though I know I should get more organized. Instead, I explored local coffee shops with a side quest that boosts community connections. No Coffee Chronicles tomorrow; I’ll be working, but Thursday brings another coffee adventure outside Baltimore City. For now, I’ll enjoy supporting local businesses, even if it doesn’t help my weight goals.

Thank you for reading this post!

May 18, 2026 0

Coffee Chronicles- Almost Got “Got” at the library.

It has been a while since I wrote a Coffee Chronicles. I haven’t been able to sit at any coffee shops or visit them for longer than 10 minutes. A few weeks ago, I decided to go to the library. I had a rare opportunity, no Trivia on Tuesday Night, due to Mardi Gras. I was torn between doing a step class with my favorite drill sergeant fitness instructor. Imagine the scene from the Crosby show when Debbie Allen worked Phylicia Rashad out until exhaustion. I played with the idea of starting back up to solid core classes, but I flash back to feeling my body tremble to exhaustion. Plus, I checked my account and didn’t have enough for a Solid core class and parking downtown. The snowstorm at the end of January messed up my rhythm to be a solid core baddie, given my current discipline level. Earlier this year, I told myself I wanted to make writing a habit. I decided to go sit down and write. I could do the Whole Foods in Towson, grab dinner, and write. Even though I considered going to the Paris Bakery, I loved the lighting and the food. I hated the parking in the area and knew it was outside my budget. Cue Dave Ramsay, “You don’t have to spend money on parking.” “You are damn sure don’t need to spend money on overpriced food when you have food at home.” So, I decided to be frugal and go to the library. I have gone to the Towson Public Library a few times. Parking is reasonable, $2.00, and going to the library is fiscally responsible.

Interior of a city library with students reading and using laptops at tables under warm lamps — People study and socialize in a sunlit city library with high shelves and warm lighting

So, I decided to go to the library, even though this particular library has a smell, and not a book smell. I should mention that there is a large, unhoused population at this library, but honestly, they’re quite nice and don’t bother anyone. I would rather have them in the library than deal with the harsh winter conditions. At least they are warm and not freezing. So, I can grow the f*ck up while I use a public space to work on a project. I got to the library ready to work on my writing when I realized I had left my cell phone in the car. I felt my eyes roll as I thought to myself that it would be ok to sit and work without my phone. I can work without my phone, but my addiction to that pocket technology called a cellphone dragged me back to my car. I couldn’t spend 90 minutes without checking TikTok or pretending to listen to music while really procrastinating by swiping. I went back to my car, trekking back to the library to sit next to the quiet older lady. She was color-coding a notebook and felt like the area I chose was perfect. I could see and hear while also maintaining privacy.

After 30 minutes, the lady beside me left. I figured she must have finished her work, so I kept typing. When I felt a pair of eyes on me, I looked around to see if someone was watching me. Cue the Rockwell song, lyrics popping into my head: “Somebody watching me.” Fun Fact: Michael Jackson sings the hook on that One-Hit Wonder. When I noticed a young man drop his bookbag at a desk over from me. I thought nothing of it and continued writing. An older man hacked up part of his lung. Which made me realize I needed a mask. I had an uneasy feeling, and I kept my head on a swivel. The man who was one desk over was not quite jumpy, but he seemed to be analyzing people. I thought nothing of it until I felt eyes on me again. I looked over at the young man, and he disappeared, moving back into the racks of books. I would be fine if he brought the books back to the desk. He still wore the pooh shiesty, and now my danger signals were going off. Whoopi Goldberg’s voice penetrated my head, the movie clip from Ghost, “You’re in Danger, Gurl.” I decided to move to another area of the desk, closer to the librarian. I settled and noticed the lady I sat beside was at the computer. I open my computer to see the young man from the back with his bag sitting in front of me. I thought, “Why the hell did he move?” I kept my head down, but noticed he wasn’t watching everyone, just me.

At this moment, all my years of watching the CBS murder mystery combo kicked in. Angela Fletcher and Perry Mason trained me in how to escape a perp without getting caught. The next time he moved, I took my parking ticket and the bank card with the least amount on it from my wallet and shoved them into my pocket. I checked everything around me. Now I could go to the third floor and sit there for a moment until I found a new target, but that felt like I would isolate myself. I noticed I have two exits. One was the bridge to the parking lot, but it was also the most dangerous, because there were no cameras, and this rejected YN could not follow me. Then the Ramp, which seems the most dangerous, takes me to the ground floor, but I could make my way to Subway or 7-11 or even run down the street where the police usually pass. Next time the pooh-shiesty fellow got up, I acted like I was going to the bathroom. I realized I should have waited to move the parking ticket and card until I got to the bathroom, but I wanted to be ready. I then bobbed and weaved through the stacks, making my way to the exit. I stopped in an area with a parent and a kid, looking as if they were about to leave.

Pooh shesity man, walked towards the bathrooms. I got up and walked out with the family, taking the ramp to the bottom floor. Why would I take the Ramp!!!!! I really am like Jessica Fletcher; that was a bonehead move. The Ramp, but I made it to the bottom. I didn’t feel it was fluttering anymore. No-Kill Bill musical sequence with whirling sounds before the bride attacks her next victim. I sprinted up the street to the parking lot and paid quickly. I took the elevator to my car. Looked around and ran to my car. I drove away, wondering if I just psyched myself out for nothing, cause maybe it was nothing. I know my danger signs, first “Rockwell,” “Somebody Watching me” playing in my head. The YN is moving to different parts of the library as I try to write. My fight or flight response is kicking in, and instead of going to the librarian and saying, ” Hey, I feel unsafe I turn this into an overactive imagination of getting to the car. I told my friend about this interaction, and their response was, “You need to be more careful.” I side-eyed my phone, my inner Kanye before his antisemitic rant came out, “How Sway?” Am I supposed to go home and never venture outside? Am I only going to the library between the hours of 10-3 pm? Was I supposed to go home, watch TV, sleep, and say, “maybe next time”? I just know that moving forward, I am going to the coffee shop, and parking next to it costs a damn. I do enjoy the library, but until I do like Cardi B, and get some Bear Mace. The library is only an option during daylight hours.

In conclusion, I was unable to write a story. The man in the pooh shiesty mask moved on to another target. But I got a really cool essay out of trying to do the right thing, and realizing I got to start my morning runs again.

May 10, 2026 0